Sometimes a headline catches my eye and I just have to read the story.
For example: “Resort blasts ‘stupid’ tourists for throwing carrots at alligator.”
Come again?
It’s a funny story at first look, along with a picture of an 11-foot alligator with a carrot stuck to the side of its face. In reality, though, it’s a look into the careless cruelty of some humans.
The Fripp Island Resort Activity Center called the culprits “a new level of stupid.”
First of all, what were these people thinking? What seems like a good idea about chucking anything at an 11-foot, powerful killing machine of a dinosaur?
In a story from news service UPI, the resort representative said the alligator didn’t respond to the antagonizing tourists, but there is a danger that the reptile could start to see humans as a source of food and have to be euthanized.
The good news is the resort has a description of the “stupid” tourists, who can be fined up to $200 per carrot.
The AP brought the world a gem of a story out of Alaska. Thanks to the children’s books, we know what happens “If You Give A Moose a Muffin,” but what happens when you kick one?
A man north of Anchorage found out the hard way. He must have thought the moose and her calf were in his way, and in true Dr. Seuss fashion — remember the North-going and South-going Zax, blocking each others’ tracks? — he wasn’t about to step aside.
I’m pondering the man’s train of thought here. A moose, around 800 pounds and protecting its baby, will certainly decide that it should yield the right of way to a man. (Should I make a remark about chauvinistic thoughts?)
He kicked. She stomped, right on his foot. I bet he was worse off than she was. A spokesperson for the Alaska State Police said the moose left the scene.
Huh. They didn’t even exchange insurance information.
The spokesperson added, “I am not a biologist, but as a lifelong Alaskan I would advise people not to go around kicking moose.”
We’re thinking she’s on to something there.
Here’s a story from UPI about more animals that fought back.
The Wellington Zoo in New Zealand said someone used bolt cutters to break into the squirrel monkey enclosure after the zoo closed for the night. No monkeys were missing, but several had minor injuries, “leading officials to believe they fought off the attempted thieves.”
That’s critters with two wins, and people with none.
I’m not sure how to categorize this next story, from Royal Oak, Mich. NBC News is reporting that the first 1,000 visitors to the Detroit Zoo on Saturday will get a free gift — Detroit Zoo Poo.
Part of the facility’s GreenFest celebration, the event is showing how the zoo recycles waste.
It’s not fresh-off-the-assembly-line poo, it’s from the facility’s anaerobic digester, which converts animal manure and other organic waste into methane-rich gas to help power the zoo’s animal hospital. Nutrient-rich fertilizer is a byproduct.
According to zoo officials, the zoo poo “is great for putting in your garden.”
Imagine what some elephant manure could do for your petunias — or pootunias, if you will.
Animals are funny, and I laugh every time I see one in a human-type situation. Cats with clothes on, dogs sitting like people. In fact, the picture accompanying this column is my brother’s dog, “Ellie,” sitting up like a person. I laugh every time I see the picture. Plus, little Eleanor is super cute.
There’s a video I was shown recently that makes me laugh every time, too. It’s a Taylor Swift song called “Trouble” mixed with a goat that sounds like it’s yelling. And it is hilarious.
“Trouble, trouble, trouble — BAAAAHHHH.” It’s the best I’ve ever heard the song sound.
One last story — how about a police department adding an animal to the ranks? Pretty common, right? Not in this case. It’s a police cat. The AP story reads, “Book him, kitty.”
It’s actually a cute story, to encourage community members to adopt pets from animal shelters. Paws-itively purr-fect.
(Schellhammer is the Era’s associate editor. She can be reached at marcie@bradfordera.com)
